OSCAR NIGHT – ‘BEST PERFORMANCE BY A DOG’ (and some humble pie)

It was a tough night for Tanner and Eugenie; they failed to predict the key awards, and had to listen to me crow about Argo‘s Best Picture win. We were all glad to see Life of Pi pick up some gold, especially Tanner who loves all movies featuring 4-legged creatures.


In keeping with the Awards, check out this video on ‘Skidboot’, a cattle dog who takes the ‘BEST PERFORMANCE BY A LEADING DOG’ hands down. Tanner was quick to point out that he’s much cuter and that he could learn all those commands and tricks, but being a terrier (American Staffordshire) he simply doesn’t want to. Hmm.


TANNER PICKS THE OSCARS

Last year Tanner proved to be a wiz at handicapping the Oscars; albeit his method was sketchy, he tabbed the Best Picture and Best Supporting Actor nods, along with a slew of other winners. Given his track record, Eugenie and I decided to let him offer his thoughts on this year’s races.

Tanner & Lou on State Street, Santa Barbara, 2/18/13

In the Best Picture category, we didn’t see three of the nominees – Beasts of The Southern Wild, Django Unchained and Life of Pi (Lou’s fault since Eugenie and I were bugging him to get the screeners).  Of the other six, Les Miz was overly long with uneven singing and a plot that jumps from a riveting ‘A’ story (Jean Valjean v Javert) to sappy, with the love at first sight between Marius (a rich frat boy slumming as a revolutionary) and Cosette. It’s a bit of a downer, but nothing compared to Amour, which made me want to run into traffic (Remember, I’m a dog and seppuku isn’t an option). We all found it sheer torture and it left us wondering how in the heck these two snooze fests get nominated when the bubbly, brilliant Intouchables came away with bubkes. But I digress. 


Lincoln was well done, with great acting boosting what is basically a lengthy documentary. Our friend, Joe Simone, rightly said it should have ended 15 minutes earlier, before the assassination, while David P, a director pal, said it l was shot with all those profiles so we would marvel at Daniel Day Lewis’s resemblance to Abe. Zero Dark Thirty (much like Hurt Locker, the 2009 winner) features a documentary story with a frosty protagonist that’s hard to warm up to. Her growth during the picture is nil. That leaves us with Silver Linings Playbook and Argo. Mom loved the former, second only to Intouchables in her year’s best. Dad said the first 30 minutes were a bit muddled but, after that, it was quite good. We all agree that Jennifer Lawrence is amazing, perhaps a new Meryl Streep in the making, and that she will take Best Actress. Eugenie liked Argo while dad liked it much better; then again, he’s a political type. It’s a tough call but I’m rolling with mom on this one. 

In the acting categories, it’s Daniel Day Lewis for Lincoln, Jennifer Lawrence in Silver Linings, Philip Seymour Hoffman for The Master (no, I didn’t see that one either and probably never will because, with the exception of Boogie Nights, Lou doesn’t care for the director’s work). Finally, the under-rated David O. Russell upsets Steven Spielberg for Best Director. Overall, last year’s movies were far superior, not coincidentally, because they featured canine stars.
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Porter update: Although he’s still fighting an infection and some post-op soreness, the tough little puppy is doing much better.

‘GET WELL’ PORTER

Tanner asked me to send ‘get well’ wishes to his friend and running buddy (literally) Porter. Robby & John Mazza adopted Porter, whose first home was the South L.A. County Shelter. The poor pup had suffered a broken leg, which his first foster owner had repaired. At that time, they used a metal plate and screws to help it heal. It left him with a slight limp but he was still really active. Lately, though, when the leg began giving him problems, Robby and John turned to the Malibu Coast Animal Hospital for help.  After inspecting the big boy, they put him under and removed the plate. Porter made it through with flying colors and is now resting at home, sporting a very cool Rambo camp bandage. He’s on restricted duty for a while but should be back to his super self very soon.

Porter, aka Rambo-dog


PUPPY BOWL (RUNNING WITH THE BIG DOGS)

Lou was busy shouting and eating with his pals and so we had to catch the Puppy Bowl after the Super Bowl, which wasn’t all that super until the last quarter. If you ask me (and my doggie friends) watching all those wiggly puppies crashing about was a zillion times better. Anyway, if you missed it, just hit the link above and check it out.

Speaking of adorable pups, you know that expression, “If you can’t run with the Big Dogs, stay on the porch”? Well, here’s a short video of a stout-hearted baby Pit Bull out to show that he belongs with the big boys.  Enjoy.

Book Update: We’ve finished all the corrections on the paperback edition of GIMME SHELTER which should be available on Amazon within the week. Be sure to get one.

GIMME SHELTER Goes Live

Thanks to a loving nudge from Eugenie, this past Friday, January 25, I read an except from GIMME SHELTER at Bank Of Books, our newest local bookstore.  The manager, Ann Lambert-Vannoy Benoit and her daughter,  Krystyn Lambert, host monthly ‘author’ and ‘poetry’ nights, where local scribes get to read from their works or their favorite authors. The large, receptive crowd, included several friends and neighbors who’d come to lend their support.  Hopefully, this was just a preview of things to come.  My thanks to them, and to Eugenie and Tanner for making the evening possible.

For a great description of the scene at this welcome new addition to the community, check out the recent post by our friend and Malibu Times contributor, Alexis Deutsch-Adler.

@Bank of Books, Malibu, January 25, 2013

For anyone who’s thinking about following my lead and self-publishing, e-book or hard copy, I have two words: Kathryn Galan of WynnPix Productions. I was totally clueless about formatting, cover design and a zillion other details that left my head spinning until Kathryn stepped in. 
A writer, editor and former film executive, in a few short days, she had my manuscript formatted, designed and ready for publication.  Even better, she scoured my book, offering thoughtful edits that preserved my voice while improving the rhythm and flow of my prose.  She is nothing short of amazing and made a daunting process look like child’s play.

A MAJOR SCORE FOR TANNER

After a long week spent building a website, dabbling with FaceBook and tweaking proofs for the paperback edition of GIMME SHELTER, Eugenie, Tanner and I had an awesome playdate with our friends, Robby and John, and their ‘kids’, Lola and Porter. While the dogs ran roughshod all over the property, we humans shared a bottle of wine and and the local news. Like every visit, much of the dog time was spent tussling over toys. When we were leaving, Robby and John surprised Tanner with a slew of rubber toys – hotdogs, birds, truck tires – that her dogs so nicely agreed to share. Poor Tanner was crazed, longing to get at his new ‘babies’ and wondering why we would make him leave the coolest place on earth. Eugenie and I vowed to stash the toys and not to break them out until he’d trashed his newest ones, which were less than a week old. Hah! Barely an hour after we’d returned home, Tanner was splayed out on the living room floor, munching on a a slime-covered ice cream cone.

Tanner & Lola

GIMME SHELTER – Available on Amazon.com

Tanner and I had planned on adding a ‘New Year’s’ post but thanks to my friend and neighbor, Kathryn Galan (Luna’s ‘mom’), we spent the first two weeks of 2013 formatting and publishing GIMME SHELTER for the Kindle store on Amazon.com, where it is now available for all Kindle devices, iPad, iPhone and Mac and PC computers. We are very, very, very jazzed and eternally grateful to Kathryn for making this happen. To order GIMME SHELTER now, just click the “10%” link below the cover photo.

10% of the profits from this book will be donated to animal rescue causes

We’ll detail the publishing process as soon as we recover but, for now, here’s all you need to know to get the book.  First, if you don’t have one (hard to imagine since it seems like we shop there daily) create an Amazon account. Then go to Amazon’s Kindle store or just type in GIMME SHELTER or my name, Louis Spirito, and you’ll be directed to the book.

If you don’t have a Kindle or iPad/iPhone, you can download a free Kindle program and read it on your laptop or desktop computer, like I did.  To get the program, click either Mac or PC and you will be taken Amazon, where they will tell you how to download the program.  Installation is very easy.


Tanner, Eugenie and I would like to thank all of our family and friends for the ongoing support, and we look forward to having GIMME SHELTER spread the word that rescue dogs, and Pit Bulls in particular, can make wonderful, loving companions.

FLORENCE NIGHTINGBULL

After a bizarrely hot summer, things were just getting back to normal in our house when Tanner, and his 2-legged daddy, were thrown another curve.  Back in August I had undergone outpatient surgery.  The procedure was minor but the bill, as anyone who’s been there knows, wasn’t quite so trivial.  Having covered my insurance deductible, I decided to see a specialist about my achy left hip.  I knew there was some wear and tear (thirty years of marital arts will do that) but I was stunned to learn that the cartilage was gone, leaving me with bone on bone.  Since the condition and pain would only worsen, Eugenie and I decided I should have it fixed asap.

On October 4th, we drove to St. John’s Health Center in Santa Monica, where Dr. Andrew Yun and his team worked their magic performing a minimally invasive surgery that left me with a matched set of bionic joints (the right hip was replaced in 2006).  A mere thirty hours later, I was back home in bed.  While I could stand, shuffle a bit and even climb our four flights of stairs, albeit with great difficulty and some pain, walking Tanner was out of the question, and so Eugenie stepped into the breach.

First thing each morning, she got me out of bed, tugged on my TED socks and shoes, and got me moving.  Then hit the road with Tanner, who was sorely miffed that she didn’t know, or didn’t care about our routine, which included a long stroll on the grounds of the church next door. Back at the house, Eugenie focussed on getting us fed and making sure I did my walking and PT, leaving no time for morning ‘play’.  Tanner was forlorn and confused.  “Why was dad acting so strangely, and why was he neglecting me?  And what was he doing walking with that scary black stick?”

At first, the painkillers made me queasy and just eating breakfast left me exhausted.  About the only thing I could manage was lying in bed, blowing through the detective novels (Daniel Silva’s ‘Rembrandt Affair’, Michael Connelly’s ‘Echo Park’) I had stacked up like planes at LAX.  Tanner seemed perplexed to see me horizontal (It’s rare I even nap) but that didn’t deter him.  If dad couldn’t or wouldn’t fuss with him, he would fuss with dad.  Ignoring a mound of pillows, and the cords from the portable ice machine, he popped up onto the bed and nestled up against my ailing left leg.

The patient, with ‘Florence Nightinbull’

It went on that way for a week, until I finally recaptured my chi and abandoned the bed for the upstairs recliner.  Once I quit our Tempurpedic, Tanner returned to his own bed where he could keep a watchful I on me.  When I made a run to the kitchen for ginger ale or Gatorade, he shadowed me. If I mummy-stepped my way upstairs to the bathroom, he tagged along and flopped down on the rug until I made the trek back down.  When I joined Eugenie and him on the afternoon walk, he slowed his pace out of respect for his gimpy owner.  Around the 2-week mark, I finally shed my cane and a few days later I took the reins for our morning walk, as if nothing unusual had taken place.  Tanner’s brief nursing career was over.

Although he’s quit nursing for the time being, Tanner stills wants to be of service to his fellow creatures, both the 2-legged and 4-legged sort.  That’s why he said to mention our dear friend, M.C. Callahan, a terrific ballroom dance instructor, who generously devotes her free hours to two animal charities in the Coachella Valley where she lives.  Healing Horses in Indio, CA offers equine therapy to improve the lives of special needs children.  Located in Desert Hot Springs, Save-A-Pet offers food and shelter to dogs in need.  It’s an outdoor facility so, with the cool desert winters nights coming, they need donations of old towels, sheets, and blankets.  So clean out those closets and put your old and unused items to a good use.

SUMMERTIME BLUES (Goin’ To The Chapel)

When Tanner & I penned our last entry, Summer was in full bloom and we were bracing for an invasion of Spirito relatives that were about to descend on Calif for our niece’s, Margaret’s, wedding.  As it is most years, the weather was sunny and cool so I phoned my brother and sisters and told them to pack accordingly; this wasn’t New Jersey with it’s scorching temperatures and brutal humidity.  Hah.  Mere days before their arrival a heatwave hit, bringing unseasonably high temps and tropical moisture.  My sibs were miffed and poor Tanner, who hates the heat the way most people hate taxes, was drained.  He lazed around panting and huffing like he was circling the drain.  


Bad enough that the ‘monsoonal’ flow (whatever the heck that is) wrought havoc on our routine, forcing us to cut short morning walks and to skip our dog park play dates.  With the heat came an onslaught of ravenous fleas that feasted on Tanner’s delectable pink belly and rump.  Every morning Eugenie and I would decimate the little buggers only to have them return in greater numbers the next day.  Frontline, borate powder, flea shampoo – nothing stemmed the insatiable horde.  

As often happens with Pit Bulls, the bites led to a nasty case  of folliculitis, and a three-week round of Keflex.  At first, getting Tanner to take the pills was a snap.  We’d wrap them in a piece of cheese, and down they’d go.  Somewhere around day 3, he sussed out our ruse, and so we moved on to turkey, deli ham and Prosciutto di Parma.  For the briefest moment, I thought about trying to force-feed the pills to him.  Then I thought about his timid nature (and his shark jaws) and decided to spring for rare roast beef.  The bloody meat did the trick, and the bumps disappeared.  To prevent another attack, we blasted the house with diatomaceous earth.  The cleanup was messy, but the fleas have cleared out.
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One month later and the heat has finally begun to ease.  Football dominates the sports pages, crowds are enjoying one last beach hurrah, and we’re celebrating Labor Day working like dogs, that is, doing nothing in particular.  Despite the heat and my sister’s emergency root canal, the wedding was a huge success, as Margaret and Ryan pledged their love surrounded by their dearest and dearest.  Eugenie and I gladly played host to family I hadn’t seen in years, and Tanner got to meet and charm a host of two-legged ‘uncles’, ‘aunts’, and ‘cousins’, all of whom fell madly in love with him.  Natch.  We’ll do it all again 4 months from now, when we fly to NJ for a second niece’s (Margaret’s sister, Kristina) nuptials.  If the cool weather holds, we’ll resumed our long morning jaunts and our doggie play dates with Kona, Luna, Dexter and Charlie.   Fingers crossed.
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I wanted to share a photo from my oldest sister, Honey, a Lieutenant with the Hudson County (NJ) Prosecutor’s Office.  A lifelong dog lover, she’s had a slew of big, feisty pups.  The current roster includes ‘Aldo’ a 100-pound hurricane refugee, and Harley, a Rottweiler rescue (her 4th Rottie).

ANOTHER SMALL STEP

Those of you familiar with Tanner’s story will remember that, when he first left the shelter, he was one very skittish pup.  A scuffed shoe or a dropped plate would send him flying.  Thanks to Eugenie’s constant affection (she never took her hands off him) and my concerted efforts to reform my foul temper, he finally began to relax.  First, we were able to coax him up onto the sofa for TV cuddles.  Then, he learned to stretch out on our bed when invited.  Of course, he stayed in the middle, close enough to let us touch him but far enough away to avoid us when he chose.  Just recently, though, that’s begun to change.  When we’re watching movies in bed (been enjoying Ric Burns epic documentary New York) he been allowing Eugenie to drape her legs across his body.  And the other night, he curled up in my lap!  I’d been busy working at probation and doing a hurry-up rewrite on my play so we think it was his way of saying that he missed me.  Regardless, it was awesome to see him acting like the beloved family dog that he is. 

We’ll see how he handles the fireworks and firecrackers this week.  Even if he freaks, we’ll be there to buck him up. 

note:  Since I penned the ‘June Gloom’ headline, we’ve had most blue, sunny skies.  Maybe my public kvetching moved the weather gods.  Either that or we’ve been lucky for a change.